When I was an early teen I had all these sexual urges that I knew nothing about how to release or to satisfy. There was a lady who rented a room across the hall from my bedroom and I prayed to God most nights that perhaps he could arrange it so she would come into my room and show me.
Of course I realized after awhile that God didn’t care for such hanky-panky or women in general, so it would seem… so I began in earnest to pray to the devil for his deliverance and guidance.
To my surprise the devil did show up, but much to my chagrin he just went over and fucked the hell outta the neighbor lady. He never even let me watch! Then smiling in the morning as he tiptoed on his little fucking hooves up the stairs, he hummed bawdily as he took the last of the strawberry pop-tarts. It was there and then that I rededicated my life to Christ and began the 700 club ministries.
Now Glory Halleluiah to God! I have Strawberry pop-tarts every morning for breakfast!!!
Praise be to Jesus!!!!!
1 comment:
I'm hungry.
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